By Tony Deyal
Ghosts, Jumbies or Guppies are invisible objects usually seen at night. Except in Trinidad, a land where increasingly anything can happen and usually does, and where revelations of all sorts are so much at hand that the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse cannot be far behind.
What that takes me back to my early years as a fifth horseman was a courthouse in Port-of-Spain, Trinidad, where a drama erupted. A prisoner put up a spirited defence. He moaned and shuddered, then he began to scream, “They coming! They coming!” He kept screaming and then “bellowed incoherent warnings of ‘jumbies’.” The Magistrate beat an even more spirited retreat.
However, Trinidad is, and was never, alone. Guyanese have their own jumbies to content with. These include “bacoos” which have insatiable appetites for bananas and milk. In return, if they are properly fed, they bring good fortune and gold for you. Then there is the “buck” which you keep until you are very rich and then give it to someone else. In other words, “you’re passing the buck.” There are also, “Bush Dai Dai” a jungle spirit and “Wattermooma”, a giant who stares at the moon and if you pass under her legs, that’s it for you. The Guyanese “Creolees” have a spirit called “Ning-ning” which has a loud shrill which precedes death. It is why the people there say, “Ah seeing Ning-Ning.” One person did see it, got help from an exorcist because he had a “jumbie” in his house, refused to pay the man and his house was “re-possessed.”
Jamaica also has its share. According to Anthony Winkler in his hilarious book, “The Duppy”, the common pastime of the Jamaican ghost or “duppy” was to romp on the naked bellies of sleeping church sisters. He saw such a preoccupation as being “an entirely frivolous one that required no formal schooling, literacy, or intellectual skills.” Mr Winkler believed that the Jamaican duppy was illiterate because no free places had been set aside for the education of the frivolous duppy population known to roam the island. While there are similar stories throughout the Caribbean, there are as many from other countries. In India there is “churlie”, a crying ghost of women who die in childbirth.
There is Mexico where a British actress, Minnie Driver, was scared by “a strange Mexican in a sombrero and a poncho at the end of her bed.” Of course, when asked what she was drinking that night, Ms Driver replied, “Lots of tequila!” Even more interesting was that US president, Abraham Lincoln, held séances in the White House. Eleanor Roosevelt, the longest-serving first lady in the US, recounted that seventy-five years after Lincoln’s death, she was sitting in her study when the maid ran in, scared to death. Mrs Roosevelt asked her: “What’s the problem?” The maid screamed, “He’s up there- sitting on the edge of the bed, taking off shoes!” “Who’s up where, taking off his shoes?” Mrs. Roosevelt asked. The made replied, “Mr Lincoln.” Both of them almost fainted.
Actually, according to one columnist, ghosts also have their uses. A rich contributor to the Clinton campaign was staying at the White House and in the middle of the night he met a tall, bearded ghost. The ghost said: “I have been walking these corridors for more than a hundred years.” The visitor then said, “In that case, can you tell me the way to the toilet?” Of course, there are others who don’t care. While a ghost has been defined as an invisible object usually seen at night, when it comes to ghosts some people are visually challenged 24/7. A doctor’s receptionist working the late shift ran into her boss’s office in a panic. “Sir, sir,” she said breathlessly, “there’s a ghost in the corridor. What shall I do with him?” Without looking up from his work the doctor said, “Tell him I can’t see him.”
Unfortunately, in Trinidad any, and all, ghosts are not just seen but they’re also heard- and loudly! While Trinidadians love some ladies so much they call them “Doo-Doo”; and call a very ugly man “Boo Boo”; eat “Cou-Cou” (or “coo-coo”) from cornmeal; “Foo-Foo (West African or English “Fu-Fu”) from coco-yams and cassava; and “Tutu” as a ballerina skirt or what young kids do in their rear end. The one that we hear a lot in the region is “Juju”. It is a spiritual belief which refers to objects or practices imbued with magical power and can give you luck, whether good or bad. Worse, they can give you energy or, most of the time, take yours away and cut you down to size. When you add Juju to Voodoo, you have Trinidad at its serious, yet funniest, best.
I saw an article in a local newspaper with a column by journalist, Laurel V. Willaims. It read, “Moved after Voodoo claims, BIR employee threatens legal action.” It went on, “A senior female employee at the Board of Inland Revenue (BIR) has issued a pre-action protocol letter to the commissioner of inland revenue saying she was unfairly transferred to another unit over allegations that she practised voodoo… The four-page document, dated February 10, was signed by the woman’s attorney, Kiran Panday, and addressed to the commissioner of Inland Revenue, Deomati Ramdass.
According to the letter, the employee, an acting Stenographer III in Port of Spain, got a letter on December 10, 2024, informing her that she was being reassigned to BIR’s legal unit.” What made it heading for the court-house was that the young lady had tried to enquire about the reason for the reassignment and was allegedly accused of practicing voodoo. She was also shown a picture of an artefact supposedly linked to voodoo. Obviously, she was no “Doo-Doo” for her boss.
The boss, Commissioner of Inland Revenue and chairman of the board, Deomati Ramdass, responded immediately to the “settle or face the court” threat. She made it clear that it was her “personal belief” that the worker, was involved in the practice of Voodoo. She provided a picture of an artefact which showed the word “Voodoo” clearly written across its torso. She added: “The uncanny resemblance of the artefact and a voodoo doll from pictures I have seen of the latter on the internet.”
Interestingly, what I saw on the internet does not help. For example, a man’s wife yelled from the bedroom asking, “Do you ever get a shooting pain across your body like someone’s got a voodoo doll of you and they’re stabbing it?” He replied, “No.” She yelled back, “How about now?” Another man’s wife yelled from the bedroom, “Would you like to know the exact day, hour, and minute you’ll die?” Horrified, he yelled back “No!” He responds, clearly upset, “Oh. Well, never mind then.”
*Tony Deyal found out that some of these creatures are terrible. For instance, ghosts are terrible liars because you can see right through them. Voodoo dolls are even worse. One lost its head and it was beside itself.
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